That's where I've been. I have been going to school, writing a law assignment (thank GOD that is over), and I have been working and so on. Pretty regular. Although I have been having a tough couple days. I only realized today that I have been single for a month. Not counting. My bad, I know I said I wouldn't anymore! I just couldn't help myself. I was in a time of desperation. Again. But any-who, I am pretty bored right now, so I thought I would do something productive. This is what I came up with.
Have you ever been persuaded by your friends to join an Online Dating site? I kind of was. Didn't last very long though, not after I noticed that 60 some odd year olds were looking at my profile! Old enough to be my Grandpa! That just isn't right. Well I mean for all you Celine Dion's out there sure, if he's the one go for it but I should shut my mouth before I get myself into some trouble. But anyhow, you can meet some interesting people for sure on there. But let me get to the "why" of joining Online Dating.
Ok so one nice sunday, in the early afternoon (I don't actually know when it happened) but anyway, I was on break with my friend Jess who works right in front of my store and we got talking because she knew how upset I was about my breakup so she told me about this one Online Dating thing that is free that would help me get my mind off of what was going on. So I said well what the hell, what have I got to lose. Soooo I did it, and met some really nice people, added some people, annnnd ya. Then I just got sick of it because you get a lot of creepers and what not. So I said well I think that was enough for me. And went on to delete my account. That my friends is the story.
It worked but didn't all at the same time, I mean it was nice getting a little of attention from different guys, a lot of them really cute, but it also made me feel lonely because they never seemed good enough. I was wrong obviously, but I just couldn't stop myself from comparing them to him. I know it won't do me any good doing that or thinking about it. So I'm not I know, easier said than done, but other than these last couple days I think I've been doing ok. I mean.. It gets easier to hide everyday. I'm better at putting on a smile, I'm better at laughing.. and not thinking of him as much, but it still hurts like hell. It's actual physical pain in my stomach. It's like someone stabbed me down there. It's not pleasant. Nope. But ya. I know this is quite public, but I know my friends won't read this. They don't know I still feel this way. I mean my closest ones do, but the rest think I'm over him. Oh well.
Anyhow, I'm done rambling for tonight!
xoxo
Steph.
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